We All Know Someone Who Has Committed Suicide – Note from Author of U Murder U (Suicide)

Most people, like me, will know someone who committed suicide or know someone who knows someone.  When I finished my MSc in Medical Microbiology at university I got a job in a renowned London hospital’s Microbiology Laboratory and it was there that I met him, my work mentor. He wasn’t that tall, was balding, of slight built and told me once that he bought some of his trousers in the children’s section of clothing shops. He took me under his wing and taught me the difference between studying Medical Microbiology and working in a laboratory and how to put my theory know-how into practice. He used to wind me up by calling me ‘Gladiola’ instead of Gladys – he told me it was the name of a beautiful flower and I believed him (we didn’t have the internet back then for me to check if it was true or not).

I worked with him for nearly seven years; two of those years were spent on maternity leave having my children. When I went back to work each time he brought me up to speed and made sure that I was okay with all the new methods.  The things I remember most are his willingness to always help me when I needed help at work and how when we had a slight misunderstanding I would frown at him, he would frown in return, we’d smile, and things would go back to normal. Once, I identified something in a patient’s sample; something that was quite rare and he confirmed what it was then got everyone’s attention and made everyone aware that I had found it and he heaped so much praise on me that I was really chuffed. I don’t know why he decided to take his own life, I don’t know what was going on in his mind or what led to things happening the way they did. I do know that even now, even years after the event, I still miss him. I named one of the male characters in my first novel after him . . . in memory of him.

Sometimes I wonder why he didn’t Talk To Someone.

They say it’s the people left behind who suffer when you go.

They do you know, they really suffer when you go, they constantly ask themselves what they could have done to stop you, what they could have done to change your mind and help you see that everything looks different in different shades of light.  A Proverb says – Weeping may endure for the night but Joy comes in the morning. You may think that you have no one to talk to, you are so wrong. Your mother or father, a relative or a friend will ask themselves a number of questions when you die, one of which will be, why didn’t you Talk To Someone?

Some faiths believe that when you kill yourself you go to hell, where you remain for eternity. I believe that there is nothing so bad that you cannot get help to deal with it. To get through the weeping you have to believe that there can be joy. Here’s A Suggestion: Pray to the God of Peace, JEHOVA Shalom, then take 15 minutes and make a list of some of the good things in your life, include the people who love you and who you will be leaving behind, heartbroken and shattered – because you are precious to them – you are loved by them.

Don’t be a statistic – Don’t be a sad memory, a hidden picture, a dark shadow, a name whispered by people with heavy hearts. No matter what you’re going through right now know this – you are precious, you are unique, your life is valuable and you are irreplaceable to your family. You can get through the darkness and into the light beyond – I say this in the voice of your mother, father, sister, brother, relative and friend. You can get through whatever situation you’re in, talk through the pain, let that be your release – committing suicide is like saying to hell with the life you’ve been given because things will never change but change happens when things are done differently.  Tomorrow is whatever you make it . . . you have free will, the God-given power of choice . . . choose life!   Finally, there are many organisations that have been set up to help people deal with problems so don’t ever suffer in silence or alone – Talk To Someone!